Saturday, April 01, 2006

Wierdness

I swear that where I work is a cross between The Jerry Springer Show and The Twighlight Zone. We had a new "girl" start last week in a different department than mine. I first noticed "her" while "she" was walking through my department. "Damn! That chick has big arms!" was the first thing I thought but as I didn't get a good look I just sort of shrugged it off. Then a while later one of my coworkers asks me if I saw the new girl. "Yeah," I responded. "So do you think she's pre-op or post-op?" says coworker. Yah. Turns out we have a tranny working on call for our company. I got a better look at "her" a bit later and this dude would not have been a very good looking guy, let alone a chick. Dude, what were you thinking?

Later on, the same coworker who was asking me about new girl decides to regale me with one of her many stories about her wierd friends. Over the past week alone, I've been on the receiving end of tales about labias, foreskins, slutty friends, druggy friends, general "cooch" talk, and various other things I would rather not hear. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding, it might be disgusting, but it's too good to walk away from. So anyway, she starts telling me about her hairdresser who has fucked 55 guys. "Holy shit!" says me. "Fifty-five guys! What a ho! How old is this chick?" Forty-two, it turns out. Then I started thinking about it, mathematically speaking. If she started, let's say at a nice average age of 16, (I know, they start way earlier than that nowadays!) then she's been at it (no pun intended!)for 26 years. That's roughly (snicker) two guys per year. Now that doesn't seem so bad after all, not these days. But still! Fifty-five guys?! I don't think I even know 55 people let alone guys! Sorry, that's still slutty in my book.

Then there's our manager... oh, yes...this is so, so good, too! I think this falls into the "labia" catagory. But, alas! I can't tell all the juicy stuff in one post so I think I'll save it for later!

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